Family portait...
by fire demoness
Summary: This is a songfic w/ the song "family portrait" by P!nk and about... well, guess! ^^this is one fic that i dont gotta hide my head in shame and embarresment...please read! for christmas!! R&R onegai!!


Disclaimer: not mine  
  
AN:I was just listening to P!nk's new CD, and one of my favorites, family portrait and I KNOW that its stupid of me to do 3 Soi fics even though I dun really like her. -.- oh well. I already did 5 other chapters for mai other fics, might as well do a songfic too! ^^. PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I really LOVE reviews!!!(No flames. And you cant say that I am a Soi fan because im not. And you cant say I am a soi hater cuz Im not.)  
  
I tried to follow the song as much as possible.  
  
  
  
1.1.1 By: fire demoness  
  
  
  
(microsoft word doesn't do italics for me, so the 4-lines are the song)  
  
Mama please stop crying  
  
2 I can't stand the sound  
  
2.1 Your pain is painful and it's  
  
Tearing me down.  
  
I looked through the crack in the wall. They were at it again. Every day of this week my parents had been fighting. I was fed up with it. I just HAD to know what they were arguing about.  
  
"NO!! I am NOT going to let you do that!! Not to Kaen!!"  
  
I gasped. My mother was crying. She rarely ever did. She was always the strong one in the family. Something was wrong. And my dad was doing to do something... to ME?  
  
I hear glasses breaking  
  
As I sit up in my bed  
  
I told God you didn't mean  
  
2.2 Those nasty things you said  
  
I slumped down against the grond, trying to hear better through the crack under the door. There was a thud and then a scream.  
  
"Oh NOW YOUR GOING TO THROW THINGS AT ME?! NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, I WONT GIVE HER UP!!"  
  
I heard my mother's voice travel through and that's when I started to get scared.  
  
You fight about money  
  
About me and my brother  
  
And this I come home to  
  
2.3 This is my shelter  
  
"Why do you even WANT to save her!? Do you want to starve to death!?"  
  
my father's baritone rang through the wooden door and I squeaked, putting my hands over my mouth in my desprete attempt to save my cover.  
  
**silence**  
  
"If we have to starve, then so be it. At least we'll starve together."  
  
My mother's calm voice told him, and I fought back a sniffle. Was it money problems? Maybe I could help...  
  
(prechrous)  
  
It ain't easy, growing up in WW3  
  
Never knowin' what love could be  
  
You'll see, I don't want love to destroy me  
  
Like it has my family  
  
I could hear the shouts and yells even through the door, although I had long crept away from it. What was going to happen? It sounded like a war, every one of my mother's yells a cannonball and my dad's thundering voice like the march of soldiers.  
  
Can we work it out  
  
Can we be a family  
  
I promise I'll be better  
  
Mommy, I'll do anything  
  
I started to crawl back to my room, their yells still following me like a chorus of ghosts. When will this ever STOP? If it was about me, what did they want from me? I could do anything they wanted... as long as the fighting stopped.  
  
Can we work it out  
  
Can we be a family  
  
I promise I'll be better  
  
2.4 Daddy please don't leave  
  
"You cant WIN THIS!! If we don't do it, then we have NO chance of supporting the other children! She would be GLAD that she can help the family! It's either her or me..."  
  
I gasped. My father? Leaving... it seemed surreal.  
  
2.5 Daddy please stop yelling  
  
I can't stand the sound  
  
Make mama stop crying  
  
'cause I need you around  
  
I entered my room and shut the door, pushing a table in front of it too. Once I had crawled back into my covers, I curled up into a ball, clutching my stuffed rabbit, Mr. Rabbit. (the only bit of humor in this.^^)  
  
My mom's crying and my dad's loud reasoning still traveled through the closed door.  
  
My mama she loves you  
  
No matter what she says is true  
  
I know that she hurts you  
  
2.6 But remember I love you too!  
  
Their fighting was finally tuned out in my head by my own crying. I knew they were talking about me. This was all my fault. This was why they were fighting. I was a burden.  
  
I ran away today, ran from the noise  
  
Ran away(ran away)  
  
Don't wanna go back to that place  
  
But I have no choice, no way  
  
*repeat prechorus  
  
I slowly walked home, dragging my muddy feet across the dirt road. It would be back to that hellhole now. I just thank Seiyruu for the hours of heaven I get away from them. My "family" I love them, it's true. But... it was just too much.  
  
(Chorus)  
  
In our family portrait  
  
We look pretty happy  
  
We look pretty normal  
  
Lets go back to that  
  
In our family portrait  
  
we look pretty happy  
  
we look pretty normal  
  
Let's play pretend, let's act like it  
  
Comes naturally  
  
I still remember when we used to be a normal family, all of us happy and cheerful. Now, there was fighting and no one smiled anymore. Is this what my life has come to?  
  
I don't wanna have to split the holidays  
  
I don't want two addresses  
  
I don't want a stepbrother anyway  
  
And I don't want my mother to have to change her last name!  
  
*chorus  
  
What would happen if my mother actually took me away and never came back? Would we be happy THEN? But... my family. I feel torn. The blue sky and birds chirping did nothing to help my mood. I felt confused. Alone. Someone help me...  
  
I'll be so much better  
  
I'll tell my brother  
  
I wont spill the milk at dinner  
  
I'll be so much better  
  
I tried everything that day. Did my chores, asked for homework help, smiled and was happy to everyone. But was it any use? None. Every time I smiled, my mom would burst into tears and hug me until I couldn't breathe and my dad would turn his head away.  
  
I'll do everything right  
  
I'll be your little girl forever  
  
I'll go to sleep at night  
  
Daddy don't leave... daddy don't leave...  
  
(end song)  
  
I still remember when I was that age. When my mother led me away in the end, still crying. I knew that she didn't want me to go and that I would never see my home again. But... I guess my daddy did love me. I will always remember the last thing he said to me.  
  
//Kaen...I-I don't want to do this. I just hope that someday you'll forgive me and I KNOW you are going to make me proud. You. Are.special. don't ever forget that.//  
  
I smiled inwardly, looking out of Nakago's window at the full moon, so much like the last one I had seen on my last day at my true home.  
  
" I didn't forget daddy. And I forgive you..."  
  
the stars seemed to twinkled as me I walked off into the palace halls.  
  
~owari  
  
OMG!! I didn't know I could write that good! ^^ ok maybe you don't agree. But this is one fic that I don't have to be ashamed of! Please REVIEW!!!!!gives me encouragement. ^^no flames please... 


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